Wednesday, March 20, 2013

foster parenthoood : If there's ever been a time to ask, it's now...



Hi y'all! It's crazy to me to think that about this time 3 years ago I was told I probably would never have children naturally. (As in, without super expensive treatments, or divine intervention.) That's when I really started researching adoption and Joey and I contacted the Children's Home of Lubbock. Then it was almost 2 years ago, after some divine healing, that I was told there was no reason I couldn't have children naturally. Yeah... that was after we'd already been licensed as foster/adoption parents. Talk about an emotional roller coaster. 

Now... 2 years later, we're still waiting on that child of ours to come along naturally. I do believe it will happen. Somedays though, and hear lately it's been more often, I've been wondering if it will or not. But I'm not giving up hope yet. Maybe in 15 years I'll give up, but not today. I still believe I'll get that little red-headed, green-eyed girl that looks just like me. And while we wait on her, I'm staying busy raising her two older brothers. ;) Teaching them to do all the basic things (BB is already counting to 10, yeah, how's that for a drug baby? He's so smart! He obviously gets that from both of us ;) ), but also how to be loving, kind, polite, gracious, and to be protective of each. Just like siblings should. 



This whole process of fostering has been such a wild ride. And now that we're moving to the adoption phase with BB, we've got all sorts of new experiences coming up. New things and processes to learn. Even a new caseworker to meet and learn about. 

A couple weeks ago we had a weekend long training to prepare us for the adoption side of things. It was long, but it was very informative, and honestly the time flew by. We also got to meet several couples new to the CHOL foster parent group. They had lots of questions for Joey and I as we had been a part of this for longer than any of the rest of them. Let me tell you, it was totally surreal to realize we were the "veterans" of this thing. But it was great! For us and for them. They got to ask us questions that no one else could answer except for someone who's actually been there. Sure... when you contact an agency like the CHOL, you get a representative to talk to, ask questions to, and just to guide you through the processes, but to actually sit down and talk with a current foster parent who's gone through so many various stages? You don't get that from the representative. That kind of knowledge only comes from someone who's been there and done that. 

So... I was thinking... there might be some of you out there who have thoughts and questions about fostering and adopting. Maybe you and your spouse have talked about it before. Maybe opening your home and heart to a child in need is something that's always tugged at your heart strings just a little bit, but you keep pushing it away because you just aren't sure what it will be like. Maybe you're on board but your spouse isn't. Maybe you have questions and have no idea who to ask. Or maybe you just aren't sure if you can do it. I mean, one of the most common responses I get from people about fostering is "oh, I could never do that" or "I don't know how you do that". 

To which I want to say : 



Well... here I am. I didn't know a thing about this before we dove into this headfirst. I've done it, been through it, and I'm here to answer any questions you have. So if there's ever been a time to ask a question, here it is. Want to know how to get started? Want to know what it takes to be a foster parent? Is it expensive? What's the training like? Is it hard to do? Want to know if we get paid, how much, and how often? Ask anything. Ask everything. I'm going to do a follow-up post to this one, and include all the questions and answers that you all ask. 

Leave a comment with a question you have about fostering/adopting and I'll do my best to give you an answer. 

Want to stay anonymous? That's okay! Send me an email at livedelightfully (at) yahoo [dot] com and I'll post your question anonymously. 

Here are the rules : I can't give out too much information about our own foster children due to privacy laws; if a question is diving too deep into my own personal life (and really, I've talked about a lot of personal things on this blog so it's unlikely any of you will go that far), I will politely decline answering it publicly (but I might still email you a response); I'm open for questions until Sunday. Then I will close the question portion of this discussion and start working on my response post. 

Maybe you're not even interested in fostering/adopting but you're just curious about this part of my life. That's okay! I'll answer and address those curiosities as well!

So let 'er rip! I'm looking forward to seeing what's peaking your interest in all things foster/adoption. 



Remember, you can leave your question in the comments, you can email me, or you can post your question on my Facebook or Twitter accounts.








4 comments:

  1. Good for you both! Wish you all the very best with the adoption process and your future. As for babes the natural way, maybe - even though there is nothing stopping you having them that way - it's the Good Lord saying he wants you to give babes a good home who would not have one?

    Isobel: www.ColdhamCuddliescalling.blogspot.com

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  2. I am so excited to read about this because it is one of my dreams to foster and adopt children someday! THANK YOU so much for sharing part of your story!!
    :) Rebecca

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  3. My husband and I just began the adoption process through our state. I really enjoy reading about your foster parenting/adoption journey. There is so little information out there for us. We are going for legally free children because I just don't know if I could go through attaching to a child then having to give them back. My question is how do you do it? Have you encountered this with your journey? Thanks for sharing with us!

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  4. Well even though you seem to have a calling at being a wonderful foster/adoptive mama I hope someday you may have that dream of a mini-you too! I know first hand being told one thing and losing all hope that a child would ever be possible naturally and now here I sit with this little miracle kicking up a storm right now.

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