Thursday, October 25, 2012

me : foster parenthood : memories

A year ago today, I woke up early. Way early. I was excited, anxious, nervous, apprehensive, and a bundle of other emotions. The day before, we had gotten a call from our caseworker, and a baby boy was going to be placed with us. Our previous foster children had left a couple months before, and after a short hiatus, Joey and I were ready to open our hearts and home to another little one. 

Here's the blog post I wrote that day: 


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Yesterday started out as a totally normal day. After two nights of staying up too late (don't worry weekend, I'm not holding any grudges) I slept in a bit and did my usual roll out of bed and stumble straight into my office routine. (A routine I've been working on breaking by getting up earlier... [oh, how God has a sense of humor...]) I worked on my blog, ran some reports for work, piddled with this, caught up on that. Had my cup of coffee. Had my breakfast. And then what was my normal, regular ol' Monday got flipped, turned upside down (thank you Fresh Prince). 

The phone calls began. Some little ones needed placement. Are we interested? : Now, after our first and only other foster placement experience of getting two children, right at school-age, we decided we were going to go a different route and go back to what we originally wanted. One child at a time. Very young, less than a year old preferably. After some back and forth phone calls with the caseworker, and with Joey (who was out doing church stuff), and after some waiting... we finally got the news that we were getting another placement. {Now, as a refresher, I can't put any information on here due to privacy laws, so from now on our little one will be known as BB (Baby Boy).} 

So... after a training class we had last night (for licensing purposes), we scrambled around Babies 'R' Us and Wal-Mart, getting a few necessities. We came home and worked on prepping the house. This morning I got up at 6:30... {6:30} and before 8 am I already had done a load of laundry, vacuumed the whole house, cleaned my office (if you only knew...), took out the trash, and did whatever prep work was left. Whew!

Here's the thing: When you're birthing the child yourself, you have some time to prepare. Granted, some people may not use that time as wisely as they should and are left scrambling at the last minute. With fostering though, you don't get that luxury of having so much prep time. You also don't get the luxury of a bringing home a tiny infant, which is all anyone cares about, so who cares if at this point you haven't put an outlet cover on every outlet possible. With fostering, you are bringing home a child of whatever age and you have to make sure your home is up to code and meets the requirements. Which means scrambling around making sure everything is as it should be. With birthing, you get some time off from work and you get to ease into a routine. With fostering, it's sudden. You have to be completely adaptable and able to work around things. For those of us who are planners, this can be an issue. 

But in the end... you're still bringing a child into your home. Into your heart. I'm okay with the scrambling, the frantic cleaning, my plans going haywire... it's all okay. Because tonight, there's going to be a little one sleeping in this room. 


This room has done a complete turnaround since yesterday morning at this time. This was the guest room. The crib was in the pink room across the hall and this room had the guest bed in it. Yesterday we took it down, moved it across the hall, and moved the crib into this room. All of that sounds very easy but there was a lot more that went into that than just a switcharoo. I don't imagine BB would want a bright pink room. Just a guess. ;) lol. I'm also guessing that there will be a painting party at my house in the next month or so for a little nursery makeover. I'm thinking grey and white chevron on the walls with accent colors of turquoise and lime green. Hmmm... and maybe orange? Hmmm... still pondering that one. Either way, it doesn't matter. Because...


Dear BB, 

I don't know much about you, but I can hardly wait to meet you. 

Love,
Your Soon-to-Be Foster Momma


Did I mention we've already got him a Halloween costume? Yep, he's totally ready for the party on Sunday... I'm so excited!!


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That was exactly one year ago today. And what a year it's been. I've never laughed more, cried more and loved more than I have this past year. When we first got BB, he was this happy baby who had some tummy issues, who wasn't very mobile, and had a bald spot on the back of his head from being laid down so much and not played with. And now, he's walking, talking, has no tummy issues anymore, and has worked his way deep into the depths of my heart and very being. He is my son in every sense of the word, and I've been so blessed to be his momma. He's a blessing to me, and to everyone who is lucky enough to know him and be a part of his life. He's a lucky little thing in that, because of our loving church, he has more aunts, uncles, grandmas and grandpas then any other kid. And although everyone always tells us how lucky and blessed he is to have us, we are even more lucky and more blessed to have him. 

And so... in this walk down memory lane, another letter : 

Dear BB, 

You are such an awesome little boy! You have blessed me so much and I'm so thankful that I get to be your momma. I'm so grateful, that I've got to celebrate so many of your first milestones: first Halloween, first Thanksgiving, first Christmas, first birthday, first crawls, first steps, first table food, and the list goes on and on. I'm even more grateful, that I get to celebrate many more of your milestones throughout your life.  You're an absolute treasure. Last night you took your first steps up a curb and up stairs without crawling up them. I can't believe how quickly you grow and learn. You've changed so much, and have also changed me so much. I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby you'll be. 

Love, 

Your Momma



And for those of you who have been following our journey with BB, here's where we stand: The judge signed the final court order for the parental termination of both of his birth parents. His birth mother is filing an appeal, which is slowing the adoption process down, but the caseworkers assure me not to worry, that the judge's decision will not be overturned. Our attorney says we just have to ride this out. So, we wait. We continue to wait this out, and one day, he'll be ours "officially" and when that happens, I will flood my blog with pictures and stories about him so I can finally share him with all of you. 

But until then, just know that he's the cutest and funniest little boy in the world and I'm the luckiest momma in the world because I get to be his momma. 

One year down, a lifetime to go. 



8 comments:

  1. Wow, what an incredible story, can't wait to see what he looks like!

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  2. Awww, Regina...what a story, written in love. I am in tears. I am praying for a quick and smooth adoption for you and BB. Can't wait to see pictures ♥ Sara

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  3. <3 I love it! So glad that things are working out for you and isn't it amazing to see what a difference a year makes?

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  4. Once again...you've made me cry! What a wonderful story though and I know everyone involved is so blessed.

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  5. You are amazing and blessed. Thank you for sharing this journey.

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  6. What a wonderful story! Sending you all the good thoughts I have as you continue in this amazing journey.

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  7. Aw...Regina, That's so wonderful! I look forward to seeing the pictures, too! Thank you for sharing.

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  8. I am so happy that you have a baby boy. I know that you and Joey are incredible parents, and are a blessing to him. Can't wait to see him!!

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