It's been one of "those" days. The days that everyone has, but few talk about. One of those days when the boys are both demanding and extra clingy, when the husband and I are just "off", when my mind is reeling with all the things I need and want to do, but I can't get anything done besides juggling babies, diapers, bottles, and sippy cups, and arguing with the husband about why there are leaves in our drive-way, why the older one is dressed in that, why it's 1:07, or other such trivial, insignificant details of life that never matter except for arguments and disagreements.
I'm weary. Weary of balancing my creative life, my "real job", my friends, my family, our budget, bottles, housework, babies. I just want to have some quiet, some time to be creative, time to watch tv and unwind, time to not be needed.
And then, evening comes, and with it, a most glorious sunset. I almost never miss a sunset and I have never met a sunset I didn't like. The sun sinks down, behind the hill with the cemetery not too far from our home. The blues and purples of twilight wrap around us. Whatever annoying things have bothered me all day, sink with the sun.
The older one gets his bath where he splashes and "quack, quack, quack"s over and over. We tuck him into bed, covered in his blanket and prayers. The younger one gets one final bottle. Then some time with mommy and daddy hovering over him, singing, talking, stretching him out, and praising him for holding his head up so well during "tummy time". Then he, too, gets tucked into bed. Wrapped up like a burrito, with lullabies and prayers drifting around him.
And then there is peace.
And I am so grateful for it.
I've come to understand that in all of the worries of life, the juggles, and the balances, in the end, there is peace. There will always be another paycheck coming, there will always be bed time, there will always be another day, a new morning, where His mercies are new again. I've come to understand that life is a hassle, and sometimes, I don't handle it with the grace that I should.
But in the end, there will always be peace.